The xoxtamaraxox Chronicles
by The Knight's Tale
Summary: Your Life With Ron Weasley is pretty much My Immortal Jr. But, instead, it has emos. It is definitely not as bad as My Immortal, but it is still pretty bad. Now includes other stories done by xoxtamaraxox
1. Chapter 1

**(Friday June 22 update: This story now includes all of xoxtamaraxox's work. Chapters 1-15 are her story "Youre Life With Ron Weasley". Chapter 16 starts with her new story "Draco and U" For those of you who have already read my commentary on "Youre Life" can just skip to that chapter. I have also changed the title of my commentary to fit xoxtamaraxox's other stories. If I can get my hands on the other story I will also comment on that but it was deleted before I could grab it.)**

**So I have noticed that there are a lot of stories out there with commentary on My Immortal. I decided I wanted to do something similar to that but if I have to read My Immortal one more time, I will probably kill myself. Then I found this little gem. It is called ****Youre life with RON WEASLEY**** by the "author" xoxtamaraxox. It is almost as bad as My Immortal. Probably the second worst HP fanfic out there. I will be translating the AN. Everything said by me will be in bold obviously.**

**Now without further ado, I give you the masterpiece, ****Youre life with RON WEASLEY**

Aothors note; ok! Leik sooo high guyz!dis iz my now fanficton!so it is caled: You're life with Ron Wesley!

Sooooo leik im a hugeeeee harry potter fan! I think dat Rupert grift is totally the hawtest guy evar! ^_^

I leik love how his hair iz like red, and it leik gos over his eyes alittle. It makes him look alittle emo, but nawt 2 emo so its god!

BTW, a luv emo boiz there sooooooooo hawt and coot! Im also emo! I cutt my rist sumtimes, and I just died my hair blak! Itz really really really coot!

Ok! Sooooooooooo I should probly start da story now1! Looololloll.

**AN: ok! Like so, hi guys! This is my new fanfiction, so it is called Your Life with Ron Weasley!**

**So, like(oh dear god, you won't keep saying that right?), I'm a huge Harry Potter fan! I think that Rupert Grint is totally the hottest guy ever! **

**I, like, love how his hair is, like, red and it, like, goes over his eyes a little. It makes him look a little emo (no it doesn't) so it's good!**

**BTW, I love emo boys. They're so hot and cute! I'm also emo! I cut my wrists sometimes and I just died my hair black! It's really really cute! (That doesn't make you an emo my dear, that makes you a poser. I was going to rant about stereotyping emos and groups of people in general, but I really don't feel like it.)**

**Ok! So, I should probably start the story now! LOLOL. (uhhhh, it's going to be a long day)**

~~~~~~~~~~~~!

I just woke up! I puled bak the curtins an outcide I c the sunbeem coming thu my window! "Itz a nice day out" I say. **(Such an "emo" thing to say)**

I taik of my pijuamas. I waz sleping in a verry coot **(you do know that a coot is a type of bird right? No? You're going to keep using it anyway? Alrighty then) **blak top. It was kind of like a spots bra butt a litle lunger cuz im not a slut lol **(sure)**. Then I taik of my pijamas. They where blak to** (of course they are)**!And they r realy comforty becuz they r flufy

IM GOING 2 NOT DECRIBE MYSELF NACKED BECUZ THTS GROSSE! DNT THINK ABOUT THAT!** (We weren't expecting you to. I'm thankful that you didn't)**

After I put on my new clothers I feeled very comforty! Ill explain wat I wpre! (I wont explane my underware becuz I think thts grose lol0 **(Please stop)**

I had new shoes on! I just bout them yesterday wit the money my parets sent me for fun! They were leik sports runing shoes (except I hate!**(random exclamation point)** Exercise!**(Then why did you get them?)**) they were blak with pink laces! Verry veryy coott! Every1 told me thiey where jealus of them becuz they cost a lot of money! (pplz were loking at them in the story 4ever in hogmeadas so I told my parnts abought them n they sent me the money 2 by them b4 any1 else could!** (So am I to understand that your family is rich? Very Mary-Sue quality stuff right there.)**) (ooo! I go to Hogwarts btw, becuz I dnt think I mentioned it yet!1)**(I think we could figure that out ourselves).**

Then 4 my pants I wore lather. (they where blak 2!) my bum lookd very nice in them becuz pplz tell me my but is VERRRYY nicelol! **(Are you done describing your appearance yet?)**

My shirt was blak 2 but wit like sum pink skuls like one the buttom a rond the hole shit! It waz very coot!

Soooooooo! When I finshed geting dresed I waked down the stairzzz! I entred the slythrin commun room an then pplz turned to stair at me! Every1 told me I was butiful! **(Do you even try with spelling and grammar?)**

Sooooooooo many nice complimonts lololololol!

So I told them I aprecated it an then walked out of the commun room down 2 the gate hall!

While I was eating my creal (witch (lolololol get it?**(Unfortunately)**) was rice crispries) some1 taped the bak of my shulder! I turned arond. 'im trying 2 eat her!' I scramed at the persone becuz whoever it was is veryyyyyyyy rude to intrupt me whale im eating!

But when I saw who I was stairing at I forgot al about my angre! **(Why? Let me guess, a "gorgeous emo" boy is behind you. What is with Mary-Sues and forgetting their anger in the presence of a "hawt" one?)**

2 b continued ! (tell me wat u think! 33333333333) **(What is the point of the 3's?)**

**Let's start counting off the Mary-Sue characteristics now shall we.**

**She is beautiful. Everyone says so.**

**People are jealous of her.**

**Her family is rich**

**She gets whatever she wants.**

**We are in for a hell of a tale. I'm really starting to get annoyed with the absence of vowels in some of the words she uses. **


	2. Chapter 2

an: ok! so i am NAWT happy with wat sum pplz said about me in the review secton! not nice! ok so sum1 caled me a TROLL! ummmmmmmmm u neva even saw a pic of me b4 idot so how do u no wat i look liek? hmmmmmm? HMMMMM!/

clue: u dnt!

also, another newsflash pplz, NO1 TALKS WITH PROPRE GRAMAR ON THE INTERNET! no1 no1 no1! if u do then u r just pathtic. lololololololol u nerds!

then sum1 said my story waz a joke, or sumthing like that! OBVIOUSLY ITS NOT REEL! its , I DNT OWN THE CHARCTERS1

ok, so here is te rest of my storY! (welll da next part :PPPPPP)

**AN: Ok! So I am NOT happy with what some people said about me in the review section! Not nice! Ok so someone called me a TROLL(I am almost certain you are one)! Ummm, you have never seen a picture of me before idiot, so how do you know what I look like? Hmmm? HMMMMM!**

**Clue: You don't(I don't think she knows what a troll is)**

**Also, another newsflash people, NO ONE TALKS WITH PROPER GRAMMAR ON THE INTERNET(Actually, yes they do. It is one of the standards set on the site when you first get one.) No one, no one, no one! If you do then you are just pathetic. Lolololololol! You nerds. (You know, if it makes me not at all like you in anyway, I will gladly be called pathetic on a daily bases).**

**Then someone said my story was a joke or something like that! OBVIOUSLY IT'S NOT REAL!(She really likes exclamation points doesn't she?) its (still don't get why this is here) I DON'T OWN THE CHARACTERS! (That's not what he or she meant by joke dumbass.)**

**Ok, so here is the rest of my story! (well the next part :PPPP(Don't understand the point of the repeating tongue. It just makes the smiley look deformed)**

there waz a boy there**(Told you)**! a super super coot boy**(You are looking at a bird boy? I would freak out)**. he had red haor that kind of went over his eyes, but not REALY. He was waring a school robe**(At least someone actually wears the uniform. Spares me having to read a page long description of clothing)** (and it was a satuday so there wasnt even scool that day! he was sooooooooo dedicated1!) He looked SUPER SEXIIIII! like so sexy. He allso had a pare of skiny jeans on**(I thought he was wearing the uniform. God Damn it!)**! i could KIND of c his bump (ok now get the pic out of ur head becuz thats grosse!)**(Then why did you even say anything?)**

"hey how r u?" he said. his voice was soooo sexiii! It was liek sum1 had taken melted buter and poured it all down my body**(…O_o..)**! sooo sexi. and then i talekd back:

"Good" i said.

"Thts good!" he said bac and then walked away**( Very riveting conversation there)**. I watched him walk way until i seen where he was goig.

"OH MY FUK! HES A GRIFINDOR!" i screamed as i through my toast at a gressy hared boi in front of me. he waz realy grosse with greesy hair and pimpels all over his face. EWWWWWWW! **(Well aren't you a bowl of peaches)**(He was only a third year tho so i guesse most 3d years go thrugh that problem**(I'm happy you are SOOOO understanding)**. well i didn't**(Of course)**, neiter did my friend (who ull meeet soon i think! lololol (that was a clue 4 the future of the story!1 "WINK WINK!") and evry1 said we had prefect skin!)

O, anyway, so after i screamed and though the toast at the grosse boy i stood up and stormed out of the hall. thats when i met my friend, Rose Delcure**)**(she is relatted 2 flere from the movies! she is her first cousin) **(I do not recall a Flere Delcure, if you are talking about Fleur Delacour however. And of course your friend is part veela.)**

Rose was very very beutiful (although pplz said that i was prettier**(Naturally)**) she had blunde hair tht she wore with bengs over 1 eye. (her left eye so ur rite eye) she also wore eyeliner (liek kind of thick stuff but not 2 thik. just the perfect ammount. (rose is very good at puting on makup) This day she had on a emo shirt tht said "im emo' with a broken hart. and skinny jeans, and coot shoes**(She is wearing birds for shoes? Nice)**. she looked very hawt!

"hi Tahirah" (thts my name!)

"hi rose" i siad bac

"how r u" rose said bac

"good" i said bac

"thats good" rose said bac

"omg guess wat rose!" i scremed

"wat" rose said exctiedly

"i saw a realy coot boi in the grate hall. he said hi to me!" i said

"omg omg omg! wat did he look liek?" rose said jumping on her feet.

"he had red hair and it went over 1 of his eyes! and he was wearing realy realy realy hawt clothes! like skiny jeans. his bum was prefect!" i said bac 2 rose

"OMG! he is RON WEASLEY**(Ok, I know the Weasley's were some of the only red haired at school, but there has to be more than that. So that description could mean just about any red haired boy. And weren't you just pissed off because he was a Gryffindor?)**" (an: oh! yea, i never new rons last name had a a in it!i thout u pplz were ling **(Why would they lie to you on how to properly spell the "love of your life's" name?)**but i googled it and u where rite! srry, i wil change the title of the story if i can!)rose yelled at me

"who" i asked bac 2 rose

"he is this REALY REALY REALY hawt emo tht all the girls LUV LUV LUV. me too of corse! but whenever a girl tryes 2 talk 2 him heliek dsnt talk bac and he like just walks away**(The Ron I know would respond to a girl)**! ur sooooo lucky tht he talked 2 u!" rose scramed

"OMG!" i scramed

"OMG!" rose screamed bac

"But wait!" i said stopping scream

"wat" rose asked

"hes in grifindor" i said bac with a tear roling down my cheak.**(Oh, you remembered hy you threw the toast now did you? And it's really not all that bad so stop crying.)**

"omg! i 4got" rose said bac and she stated to cry 2.

"he was perfect beside tht 2" i yelled angy

"i no" rose said bac

so then me and rose went bac 2 the commum room and cut and sat and cired in our beds cause we where sad**(Because that is what normal people do)**. so we staied there the rest of the day. we even cut ourselfs a little near the end of the day becuz it suced. ron weasley semed perfect BESIDES THE FACT THT HE WAS A GRIFINDOR!**( Great reason to cut yourself. That's why I do it).**

why did he have 2 b a grifindor? **(Because he is brave an that is where the sorting hat put him. Did you even use the sorting hat, or did you just sit at a random table?)**

2 b continued!

tell me wat u think! **(You don't want to know what I think.)**


	3. Chapter 3

An; so u pplz are still saying i look liek a troll when NONE OF U HAVE EVER SEEN A PIC OF ME B4. wow i thout this plcae was supose 2 b mature. i guess nawt RIGHT. sure i may b a little overwait but NOT MUCH no more thn a normal grl my age. so stuf PLZ ok.

and i allready told u no1 uses gramar on the internet, ITS THE INTERNET. omg. u pplz r so retarted. lol. retards.

so, here i the rest of my story!

**AN: So you people are still saying I look like a troll when NONE OF YOU HAVE EVER SEEN A PICTURE OF ME BEFORE. Wow, and I thought this place was supposed to be mature(Everything that you have put in this "story" is not Mature, so what exactly are you complaining about?) . I guess not RIGHT! Sure I may be a little overweight, but NOT MUCH more than a normal girl my age. So stop PLEASE ok (I still don't know how I made that out).**

**And I already told you, no one uses grammar on the internet, IT'S THE INTERNET. Omg, you people are so retarded. Lol, retards(I don't think it is cool to call people retarded, but since you are saying that people who use correct grammar are retards, I will say it to you. You are a retard because you don't use correct grammar).**

**So, here is the rest of my story! **

i woke up the next moning (which was sunday becuz the day b4 was saturday becuz they had no lcasses so tht makes 2day sunday!**(Why did you have to clarify that for us? I really don't think we care at this point.) **) my rists where sore becuz i was cuting them all day yestreday with rose. there was dired up blod all over my rist but i didnt care. i hated the fact tht ron weasley was in grifindor**(Great reason to cut your wrists)**. IT MADE ME SOOOOOOOOOOOOO MADDDDD! he was soooo perfet 4 me, becuz he was emo and i was emo. but i dnt date wuld b a betryal of slitherin. so i got out of my pijamas (wich where: blak slky pijama patns and a bagy t-shirt whicg was blac wit broken harts and skuls al over it **(And we care why?)**becuz i was soooo sad becuz of how ron was a grifiondor **(will you stop complaining about it please!)**nd so i wore tht tshit becuz it was an emo tshirt and thts why i wore it!)

I chaged into: a vry lowcut mini shirt. it was made of lather and was super super super sexi. i also put on vry long blac soncks with skuls on them. then i put on a tshirt that was tight and shoewd of my braest realy realty good. (but dnt look there becuz thts disgusting ok!) it had on whit skuls and pink buterflys coming frm the skuls. it was realy COOT! finnaly i put on my shos tht i got tht every1 else wanted. i looked super super coot in the miror!**(That's the life of a Mary Sue.)**

when i had finshed chaning**(What were you chaining?)** i walked don 2 the slitherin commumm room. pplz turned 2 star at me when i walked down**(Maybe they realized how stupid you are)**. but i igored all of them nad walked over 2 rose who was siting in the conor **(She was sitting on someone named Conner? I'm sure they loved that. I wonder how comfortable that is?) **by the fireplace. she loked sad so i never said anything but just sat next 2 her.

finnaly after wht seemed liek 4EVER rose finnaly spoek!

"im so sad tht ron is a grifindoer" she said**(why does she care?)**

"i no me 2" i said bac**(Seriously, it's getting old. Get over it if it bothers you that much.)**

"hes soooo coot 2" rose said bac

"i no, hes is coot" i said bac

"i just wish he culd ba slitherin" rose said

"i no, me 2" i said bac

"i think i ned 2 cut my rist agin" rose said finnaly after liek 2 minets of not saying anyhing.

"me 2" i said bac

so rose and i got razors frm ur roms and we used them 2 cut iurselves on ur rist. it hurt but it felt good qat the same time becuz he made us releise ur pain. we cut urselves all moruing untill lunch time.**(Because that is healthy.)**

when it was finnaly lunch time me an roe went down 2 the great hall and to eat lunch. 4 lunch i dediced 2 have:

chickne and fires and orange juice ad a cookie 4 desert and stuf liek that. it was realy good.**(What was the point in saying that?)**

but, after i ate it all i didn fell good becuz i was still sad tht ron was a grifindor. i told rose this and she sad tht i was 2 good 4 him and tht it was his lost so i said:

"ur rite" i said

and then 2gheter me and rose walked out of the great hall 2gheter and we where kind of hapier than b4 becuz now i new i was 2 good 4 ron. but, just as we where exciting the great hall we saw a flsh of red hair and herd a hot, sexii, sweat, beutiful voice. liek the voice of a angle.

"h-h-h-h-h-h-h-hiiiiiii Tahirah" he said.

i locked up and saw tht it was ron. rose gave a litle screem an then ran away out the great hall dors 2 the outside. i was all along with ron.

"ohh, hi ... grifindor" i said making my voice s evil as posible 2 make him relise tht i ddnt like gifidors. but it was hard 2 make an evil voice becuz he was so hot and sexii. **(Again we are shown the marvelous gift Mary Sues seem to have. The uncanny ability to forget all their angers and problems when a hot and sexy guy is around.)**

"i no tht ur a slitherin and im a grifindor and ussualy we pplz dnt get along well**(No shit.)**." ron said

i said nothing.

"but, ive beem asked out by alot of grls at this school**(Since when? I love you Ron, but you're not exactly a stud muffin)**. but ive never been intrested in any of them. they wrnt pritty enuf or they where 2 meen. but, u seem difernent**(*cough* Mary Sue *cough*)**. u seem sweat and nice, and ur probly he most beutiful grl ive ever seen as this school.**(repeat of last comment)**" ron said

i said nothing aggin, but a teer was beging 2 roll down my cheak.

"so, Tahirah**(I am still not getting her name)**" ron said

but i ssaid sumthing b4 he could finsh:

"Call me tay" i said trying 2 keep an evil voice but it was hard becuz he was soo coot and sexii.

"ok, tay. wuld u liek 2 go out with me." ron said.

"OMG! OMG! OMG!" i scramed

"YES! u r so sexii!"

ron smiled and 2gether we walked out of the great hall dors!

2 b continued! (tell me wat u think! but TALK ABOUT MY STORY THIS TIME!)**(They were talking about your story before in the reviews. And I don't think you really want to know what they think about your "story".)**

**I forgot to count up the Mary Sue qualities in the last chapter so I will have to do both chapters now I guess.**

**Last Chapter:**

**She doesn't have bad skin**

**She has a beautiful best friend/side kick yet the main character was still prettier even though her friend has veela in her.**

**Has a weird ass name**

**Her future lover is liked by all the girl but only gives her the time of day.**

**This Chapter: **

**She describes her clothes in to much detail.**

**Ron thinks that she is different and special. She is the only girl he gives the time of day to. **

**The next chapter will either be later today or mid-afternoon tomorrow.**


	4. Chapter 4

**This is actually the longest chapter yet.**

An: ok so u pplz r VERY rude. i sugest u fcking stop it RITE NOW. its pathtic! serriousy, pplz saying im ugly, n pplz

saying all kinds of other shit. its horible. i am writing, NO1 CAN STOP ME. OK. IF U DNT LIEK IT THEN DNT READ IT

IDOTS! HONETLY U PPLZ R ALL RETARDED. I U ALL KEEP SAYING HOW MUCHB U HATEB MY STORY BUT u ALL FCKING LEEP READING IT

ANYWAYS.

THATS RETARTRED.

ok so 4 those pplz u actualy care, hers th e rest of myt story!

!**(Random explanation point)**

**AN: Ok, so people are VERY rude. I suggest you fucking stop it RIGHT NOW. It's pathetic! Serriously, people are saying I am ugly and people are saying all kinds of other shit. It's horrible**

**I am writing, NO ONE CAN STOP ME. OK! IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, DON'T READ IT.**

**IDIOTS! HONESTLY PEOPLE ARE ALL RETARDED (I wonder when she will stop using all caps). YOU ALL KEEP SAYING HOW MUCH YOU HATED MY STORY, BUT YOU ALL FUCKING KEEP READING IT.**

**ANYWAYS, THAT'S RETARDED.**

**Ok, (Yay, she is finally done with caps.) so for those people who actually care (Who does though? Seriously, give me one good review you have gotten that wasn't your sister.) here's the rest of my story!**

ron an i where walking outside 2gether. we were holding each others hands. his hands where so soft, yet hard at the same** (That is possible how?)**

tmie**(Does any one understand this?)**. they where amzing hands. they where sio much biger then my hands so my hands git perfectly into his hans. he made me

fel protected u c.

we where walking down the great hall sdteps 2gether outside the great hall. every1 outside turned 2 star at us.

"Is that Tahirah with RON WEASLEY?" I herd every1 saying. **(Why do they care?)**

"I herd that ron dndt go out with any girls!" I herd other pplz saying. **(That is not completely true. Has anyone seen Hermione yet?) **

"She must b sumthing special." I herd other pplz saying who never said naything tht was said above. **(This sentence so doesn't make sense.)**

i blushed becuz i was embarsed. but i was happy 2 becuz ron was super sexi and hawt and coot and emo** (It's all about looks)**. his skinny jeans showed

his bum prefectly i reely wanted 2 grab it **(nice) **but i resited. he akso had on a plain wite tshirt. it went over his mucles

perfectly and showed of his realy sexii arms! i put my arms arund his arms and felt his strong muscles. SOOOO HAWT!** (We get the point)**

"lets sit under the tree" ron said

"k" i said bac

"k" ron said bac **(She writes the best dialogue, so deep)**

and the 2 of us went and sat under the tree. we never said much we just sat there. pretty soon a hole bunch of girlks satated

2 sloly come up 2 us quitly and under the bushes but i saw them first. they were realy young liek in 2nd year or sumthing

ithink but i wasnt sure.

"GTFO OUT OF HREE BITCHES!" iscramed at the top of my longs and they all went runing awy.** (Wow aren't you the nicest person ever.)**

"stopid bitches" i said 2 ron

"there just jealus" ron said bac** (Because everyone is jealous of…..what is this characters name again.)**

"i no" i said bac 2 ron

"dnt let them bother u" ron said bac 2 me

"i wont" i said bac 2 ron

"good" ron said bac 2 me.

then ron tuned 2 me and ooked me stait in the eye.

"ur the most icirdible grli ever met" he said 2 me

"ur the msot incridible boy i ever net" i said bac 2 him

then, he bliked his hawt, sexi eyes and brushed his hawt sexi red hir out ofhis eyes. sloyl he leened in. we where geting

close, closer, closer!

"OMG! U FCKING BASTARD!" i scarmed **(WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!)**

i ran away a fast as i culd. omg omg omg. he was a grifindor! how culd i have forgten?

i had forgoteen!

NOO!

NOOO!

NOOOOOOO!

i betayed slitheinb.** (I'm pretty sure no one would really care in real life.)**

he was a bastard! he tied 2 sedoce me! with his good looks ans his sexii smile, and air, and eyes, and

skinty jeans, and bum.

NOOO!

he used me! **(In what way?)**

noooooo!

i ran up 2 the commum room and there i took out a rasor blad and used it 2 cut mysekf in the rists over aned over and over

and over again.

my rists where beleding ZBUT I DIDNT CARE! **(I would care if I was bleeding, but that's just me. I must have this weird thing about dying.)**

ron was a bastard

"hes a bastard"! i scramed at the top of my lungs!

"fck him dead! **(LOL! I laughed so hard at this sentence. I'm going to scream fuck you dead to my friend Landon and see what he said.)**" i screamed again at ht top of my longs!

"i deserve beter!" i screamed against the top of my lung!Q!

soon the blod was going EVERYWHERE

EVERYWHERE** (Maybe you should talk to someone)**

it was all over the place ansd so iwas losing 2 much OMG OMG!

OMG!

I WAS FANTING !

i felt ligheaded!

the ropm was spinng faster and fastesr and FASTER AND FASTER AND FASTER!

nooooo

noooooooo

nooooooooooooooooo1!

everything wenty blac!** (Are you dead? Please dear god be dead.)**

!RONS POV!

omg? why did she just doo tht 2 me?** (I'm still a little confused too.)**

wht did i do? **(I have no idea.)**

i dnt no!

i stated 2 cry rite there under the tree. i didnt no wat to do. Tay had just brokn my hart! i gave he4r everything!** (You have been dating all of one day.)**

and then she tok it up and broke it into amilion smitlerinzines! how culd she do this 2 me? HOWWW? i didnt no.

all i new was that Tay had sumthing wrong with me and i intentd 2 find out wht. so i march ran as quicly as i culd up 2 go 2

the castle and opebn the front sdoors 2 the grate hall. but thts when i saw harry, and he waved me foward.

"ron is the romor tru?" harry scarmed at me and he loked angry.

"what romor?" i said bac 2 harry

"that u are dateing a slitherin!** (Didn't know it was a rumor. Thought it was more of a fact.)**" harry yeled as lud bas he culd 2 me grls close by trned arond and

stared at the 2 of us. they were kind of coot. but not realy **(Then why even mention anything)**. and then i thoght oh Tahira and my hart gave a guilt tugy

feling. i looked bac at the grls and they looked ugly now.

"soooooooooo!"""" harry sdcar,ed bac 2 me again. i looked harry rite in the eys. harry was soo hawt. his sexi eyes and hair. **(Where the hell did that all come from?)**

i even saw heis abs evry nite when he took of his shirt 2 go 2 bed. they where perfect! i then tought

ofTahirah. she was mad at me. and i didnt no why. mayb it ws a hint that harry was my tru luv!"** (Really? Yes of course, that is exactly what it means.)**

"those romors are FALSE" i scareamed 2 harry. he smiled and he looked so sexi at the same time. i didnt reget my desision.

"good" harry said bac 2 me.

i never confeshed my tru fellings 2 harry b4. i think he new i was bisexieul. i thought tht wuld b the time. **(You never mentioned these feelings before.)**so ileaned

4ward, and oloking harry rite in the eyes i kised him. i puled away from my lips his lisp ands we stared at each iother 4 a

second. the grls tht were next 2 us gasped in suprise. harry turn raound 2 them.

"OBVIBULAE" he scareamed 2 them.

"wht did u do" i asked harry

"whipped there meories" he said

"now stop talking and kiss me agan" he said 2 me.** (They can still see you know? You're just going to have to wipe their memories again. And again. It will be like that scene from Men In Black.)**

i leened 2ward and kised harry again. this time with more pasiont. we kissed in2 the bloom cupbord and clsed the door bhind** (When did you go into the broom cupboard?)**

us!

2 b continued (SHOCING CHAPTER!** (Damn straight. I still don't know what is going on.)** i no! tell me way u think. i no it was boring at first, but thins are staring 2 heet up!)

**Mary-Sue count time.**

**Everyone is jealous of her for no reason**

**The guy who she is dating is a big deal to everyone else**

**Just the same old same old stuff**

**Next chapter tomorrow.**

**So there is this other story that I found in the Glee archives. It is called Da Princess in da glee club. It is hilariously stupid. In the comments, people have been leaving flames role playing as the Glee characters AND as Harry Potter characters since it was mentioned in the story. I kinda want to do a commentary on that, but I would really like to finish my own fanfiction first as well as this commentary. But look it up. Flame and report. The other stories this "author" has written are equally as bad. The author is racist, stupid, and makes child abuse seem like a regular occurrence. I would say more but I don't want to give it away. **

**See you later!**


	5. Chapter 5

AN: wow. u pplz r ALL RETARTS. if u dnt like mty sorty then DNT READ IT RETARDSS. k? nawt tht hard. irf u where all as smnart as u say u r then u WULD HAVE RELISED THIS IDIOTS! FUCKING RETARRDED IDIOTS. all of u!

ok. so leave, NOW if u dnt like it k? its NOT TBHAT HARD! and u pplz dared 2 caled me stupid lolololollol iditos

so here is the rest of my story. IF U DNT WANT 2 READ IT LEAVE NOW k?

PS I will b 13 is kliemk less than 2 weeks so STUFU!

**AN: Wow. You people are ALL RETARDS. If you don't like my story, then DON'T READ IT RETARDS. (Usually I agree with this, but you are so stupid and annoying that it's is alright) Ok? If you were all as smart as you say you are, then you WOULD HAVE REALISED THIS IDIOTS! ( FUCKING RETARDED IDIOTS. All of you!**

**Ok. So leave NOW if you don't like it K? It's NOT THAT HARD! And you people dared to call me stupid lol idiots. (But you are stupid)**

**So here is the rest of my story. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ IT, LEAVE NOW ok?**

**P.S. I will be 13, is kliemk(I didn't understand what this meant so I left it as it was.) less than two weeks , so STUFU!(What does this have to do with anything.)**

Back 2 Tahirahs **(That's the bitch's name. I forgot again.)**POV

i woke up. there was blod all over my close. but i didnt care.** (Why not? I would be fucking freaked out.)**

"OMG! wat hapened 2 me** (You sound like you care.)**" i asked some1 who i didnt no who yet.

"u pased out becuz u had 2 much blod loset." said a voice. i turned aronund 2 c tht the voice came from snape, the potition tracher. usually i dnt liek techers nut asnape was diferent becuz he understod my suferings and stuff and he was god **(SNAPE IS GOD! I KNEW IT! I am so joining his church.)**with giving adviece 2 pplz and students who have tuble with other pplz. **(Since when has he been good with communicating with other human beings) **liek onc i was going out with this other boy but i got boraed with him so i sked snape way2 do and he gave me tghe best advice how 2 dumop the guy,. iused it!

"omg! i never did tht b4" i said bac 2 snaep!

"i think u jsut lsot controle" snape said vbac 2 me** (Shouldn't he be worried? Send you to a therapist or something? Have you guys every noticed that therapist is spelled the rapist.)**

"i was very sad" i said bac 2 snae looking at mty cuts. they hrt but the pain felt good on my rists. i remembers ron and wat a basatrt he was and sudenly the pain in my rists wasnt even close 2 the pain in my hart.

"tht BASTARD RON!" i scamred. **(Wow. Random blow up. You sure do scream a lot.)**

"ron weasley?" snape said bac 2 me

i loked into his blac eyes. the4y were so sorrowful and sadly looking bac at me. i then noticed how hawt and coot snaope realy was. **(….ummmmm please don't go where I think you are going to go with this.)**

"yes, HES A BASTARD!" i told snape bac and tried 2 b as sexy and hot as posible while doing it. **(Can you be sexy while you scream? I recall Ebony trying to do the same thing. I should really just start calling you Ebony Jr.)**

"hes a grifindonr oh curse hes a bastard" snape said bac 2 me. his eys where lokiing at my brests.

"OMG! STOP LOOKING AT MY BRASEST!" i scamred 2 snape who locked away fwhen he saw noticed i noticed him loking at me. **(Weren't you just trying to be sexy towards him?)**

"im sry Tahirah"

"CALL MY TAY" i scaremd with impatience** (You really are bi-polar. Mostly angry though.)**

"im sry tay, i justn never it was not nan instince but il never doit again **(What the hell did he just say?)**. u just look so beautifukl." **(Beautifuckl. Beautiful and fuckable mixed. I kinda like it.**

i stoped looing so mad becuz snaope was so sweat. SWEATER THAN THAT ASTARD RON AWAYS!

"im sry 2"i said bac 2 smaep

"I think ur hot 2" i said bac 2 snape afte he never said anything for a few coule minutes of silecne. **(Nasty)**

"u do?" snae said and he smiled OHHHH heis smile was sooo sexiiii. and hot,. OMG! i melted. it was like a needle in my hart that wulndt let come out!

"I DOO!" i scamred 2 snape. he smilesd again. THAT SEXUIII SMILE! OMG!** (So nasty)**

"will u kiss me?" snapes said bac 2 me

"yes!" i scarmed and ran and kissed nsape. he tasted soo good.

"Uyums!" i said after we finished kissing for a ouple hours

"u taste good 2" snape said bac 2 me **(So fucking nasty)**

"u 2" i said bac 2 samep

"and dnt wrry. ill fail tht bastard ron on his next test. no1 breeaks ur hart and gets awaty with it!** (Because he won't get in trouble with Dumbledore or whoever is the headmaster for that.)**" snape screamed in a sexy voice of dewath and sorrow. oHHH THAT VOICE.

"OMG! thanks u u r amzing bf!" i said bac 2 snape

"im ur bf?" snape said bac 2 me smiliny sexily at me. **(You just made out with her. I would hope you were. Then again, Mary-Sues always end up being sluts.)**

"YESSSSS" i screamed

"yes yes yes yes yeas! u r such a god kisser **(A god kisser…..I don't even know what to say about that.) **u wil make sucha good boyfriends** (There is more of him? How many clones does he have?) **!" i wwthen waved gb 2 smnape and huriedb off the ofice.i waled up the dungeosn until i was in the greate halls. then i felt liek fgoing 4 a broomstick rice becuz quittish trilas where coming up soon nad it would b good 2 practice. but i allready new i wuldm make it becuz im the best flier in the school becuz we had tests jsut 2 weweks ago 2 c who was rth e best and i got first and ron (THT BASTARDS!) got second and rose got 3rc. so iwent 2 the broomstick room and opned the door and rthen! **(I'm pretty sure that Harry is better than Ron. I don't think you read the books but I imagine you could figure that out by just watching the movies.)**

I SAW RON KISING hARYR POTERES (another BASTARDY FGRIFINDOR)s dick! **(Fun!)**

"EWWWWWWW u homsexuels** (Because that doesn't make you seem homophobic) **" i sccaredm! and ran way (an: its not nice 2 call gay pplz gay** (Since when.)** so u r supsoe 2 call them homosexuels becuz they kliek it more. were learning about this in schol. personaly i dnt c why calling gay pplz gay is so rong but i want 2 be etical in my story so i tohught it was beter 2 do the story liekb thios insted!**(I have never even met a gay guy who told be that they preferred to be called homosexual. My dad is gay and he has never mentioned anything about it. I really doubt your school would say something like that. You know, you have said some stupid shit before but dear god. Do you know how much dumbass that just made you out to be?**)

I herd ron coming chasing behnd me but i an fater and gaster until i reched the stairs.

"STOPICUS!** (While I do like this spell, I'm still going to give the award to Ebony for randomly calling out crookshanks while pointing her wand at Voldemort)**" some1 scramed beghind me and i was stuck becuz i culdnt move.

"OMG U FCKING BASTARD!" i scarmed at the top my lungs. girls where looking at me frm steps above but i just tokld them 2 fuc themselvcws. i wasnts in the mod for sily teenage dama.

"kET ME GO!" i sacremde.

"NOT UNTIL U LISTEN 2 MY SSDE OF THE SOTRY" i herd ron scarem

"NO ASTARD!" i scaremd bac at him. **(You keep calling him an astard, and I'm pretty sure he doesn't know what you mean by that.)**

"2 bad bitcvh" i herd him screem 2 me. **(I love how you are portraying Ron.)**

"OMG U R SO FUCING RUDE!"i scamred bac 2 him.

"DEEL WITB IT WHORE!" heb screamed bac 2 me. **(You stick it to her Ron. Not literally.)**

"OK BUT HURY!" i scaredm bac 2 him

"Im getting swore!" **(Yes you have been swearing a lot if that is what you mean. Probably isn't.)**

"Ojay, her is my side of teh story" Ron started

2 b coninued! STATING 2 hEEAT UP! (tell me wat u think. IF U DNT LIKE IT DNT SAY ANYTHING K!)** (Well you won't be getting any reviews then.)**


	6. Chapter 6

AN: SHUT UP! if u dnt like the story DNT READ IT! im not hanging my tryping style 4 u IDITS! i have beter thing 2 do than 2 listen 2 u fckers bitch and mon abut a stroy they DNT EVEN LIKE! if u dnt like it DNT READ IT FCKERS.

ugh u pplz r disgusting annoying. and stop caling me stipid. im not the 1 going arund reding storys i dnt like. thTS U MOTHFUCKERS!

O, and i hav nuthin aginst gay pplz. tahirah was just surpried tht harry and ron where bisexuals so she jmped 2 conclsion. she ist agint gay pplz she was just shoked. DUH!

so, here is the next part of my stry! i hoe u liek it. (if u dnt like it THEN DNT SAY ANYTHINGN AT ALL. dint ur mother say if u dnt hasve sutmhing nice 2 say DNT SAY ANYTHING AT ALL? yea, so STFU gayz/

**AN: SHUT UP! If you don't like the story then DON'T READ IT! I'm not changing my typing style for you idiots! (I love how she is the one that is omitting vowels from her writing and we are the idiots.) I have better things to do than listen to you fuckers bitch and moan about a story they didn't even like! (Then don't read the reviews dumbass. And I love complaining about stories that I think are stupid. I complain about Twilight at least 8 times a week.) If you don't like it, don't read it fuckers.**

**Ugh, you people are disgusting and annoying. And stop calling me stupid (Never!). I'm not the one going around reading stories I didn't like. That's you motherfuckers!**

**Oh, and I have nothing against gay people. Tahirah was just surprised that Harry and Ron were bisexuals so she jumped to a conclusion. (Non-Homophobic people do not scream you homosexuals to people.) She isn't against gay people, she was just shocked. DUH! (I really hate it when people add duh to the end of something. I think it is a little mean. And that is coming from a really mean person.)**

**So, here is the next part of my story! I hope you like it. If you don't, then don't say anything at all. Didn't your mother say if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all? (Obviously, you didn't get the same lecture. And no, my mother always said to help the stupid people. I wonder where I get my bitchyness from?) Yeah, so STFU gays. (That doesn't make you see homophobic at all.)**

"imlistning" i shuted at ron **(You "shut" Ron? I didn't know you could close someone.) **who was stil a few stets belo me on the srtarecase.

"ok. here if my story" he said bac 2 me and a single ter roled down his face. he was soo coot. sudenly i wasnt so mad at him anymoer.** (The weirdo quality is back)**

"ur so sexy" i whisperd 2 myself.

"wat?" he whispered loudly bac 2 me.

"i didnt say anything BASTARD!" i scaremd bac 2 him. continuye ur motherfucing story aswhip. **(Did you think the last part or say it?)**

"ok bitch i wil" he scaremed bac 2 me.** (I love Ron in this story. He is so much fun and sweet and kind.)**

"afte ru said tht mean thing 2 me (an: go bac 2 chapter 3 2 c wat she said**(We remember)**) i felt so emo. i was cring 4 a lung time by myself. then finaly i walked up 2 the casle by myself. i was going 2 cuyt. thts when harry comfarted m **(I keep picturing that Queef episode of South Park for some reason. Incidentally, I did not like that episode.) **and asked me if it was tru tht i was going out with a slitherin.

"THT BASTART!" i scaredm **(How does that make him a bastard?)**

"let me dfinsed" ronn sad bac 2 me

"ok so afte tht i noticed how hawt hary was."

"OMG! u bbetaing **(What?) **bastard!" i yeled 2 ron. and i kiced realy hard and the corse tht was hoding me let do. i was fre so i started 2 run.

"ROPKABRAV** (The spells in this story are so awesome)**" ron scaredm behind me and i felt rops all over me and ting me up. OMG tht bastard!

"u wil klisten 2 the rest of my stry!" he said 2 me.

"fine bastart2" i scdamred bac 2 him and gave him the midle finger except i culdnt becuz i was ropd up so i jsut pertnded i gave him the midle ginger. **(Then how would he know that you were? What is the point if he doesn't know?)**

"so then i kised harry." ron said.

"OMG OMG OMG! U GYA EMO! **(If she isn't homophobic, then why does she keep making a big deal about him being gay.)**" i scared 2 ron.

"im bisexuel!" ron sad 2 me.

i stoped wigling.

"OMG!" i scaremed

"bisexuels emos are SOOOO AWT AND COOT!"** (Oh so since he can sleep with you now, it is alright for him to have kissed Harry? Where the hell are Hermione, Draco, Ginny, Neville, Luna, and everyone else? The only cannon characters we have met are Ron, Harry, and Snape.)**

ron smild

"thnkz" he said 2 me with his sexii smile on his mace.

"com kis me!" i shuted 2 ron.

"ok" he said bac 2 me.

so ron ran up 2 me, withis sexi hot red emo har and sexi smil adn rthen skised me pasionelatly. we frnch kised 4 a wile on the stares. a few yupinger **(what is a yupinger?) **grls stared at us and gave us grosse loks but i new they didnt understod. they werent in love liek i was **(You mean lust.)**. then, rite in the halway ron stated 2 go up my shit **(…help me. I just died inside)**. he feled my bobs **(There are two guys named Bob in your shit. I would be a little scared. This story just scares me in general.)** and played with them 4 a litle bit. **(What did they play? Patty Cake, Halo Reach, Tag….)**

"OMG! RON!" i scamed in hapiness. he was talking of my emo bar. **(Wait. You own an emo bar. And since when was Ron talking about any bar.)**

"i want u 2 fck me!" i tod him!

"ok" h sad bac 2 me. but, just then wen he finaly got my bra takn of ...

"AVARD KABRVA" su1m scarmed behind us.

"OMG U BASTQRD U KILED RON!" i sacmred. **(WTH!)**

"tay i did it 2 pertect u." i lokd dwn 2 c snap saying there with HARRY POTER. **(Since when do they know each other well enough to want to protect the other? Protect her from what? From the reputation of being a slut because she already has that.)**

"potter u BASTARD!" i scarmed

"u sertuced **(I have no idea what she was trying to say there.) **my man" i scarmed agin.

"BITCH" he yeled bac 2 me.

"tahirah i thot i was ur man" snape said and a smal tare ran dwn his face. **(Come on this is the same old song and dance. Mary Sue falls in love with Cannon!Stu. They get in an argument about something stupid and Mary Sue sleeps with other Cannon!Stus. The original couple make up and the others are left to die or be paired with the Mary Sue's Mary Sue sidekicks or in Yaoi/Yuri pairings.)**

"im boared with u no snape becuz ron is bisxuel and luv bisexuel." **(Great reason to ditch Snape. Never mind the fact that you are underage and he is a teacher.)**

"well ron is now ded" snape sadi 2 m,e. **(For how long though. You know he is just going to come back anyway.)**

"noooooooo!" i scamed

snape laugde but hary had a small tare reun dwn his dface.

"i luved ron" he said.

"stfu poter" snape said 2 harry.

i looked into harrys eys. they where so blac and hawt and emo and coot and sexi. **(This bitch moves on quick.)**

"OMG! hary u r so sexi" i shouted and ran downstars 2 him.

"wht abut me tay?" snape sad 2 me with a ter coming dwn his face.

"ur grosse and stopid" i said 2 snape becuz he desved it. he atacked ron. **(I thought Harry killed Ron. I am so confused.)**

"u realy lik me?" harry said 2 me. **(No, she lusts you.)**

"yes" i said bac 2 harry.

"lets go 2 hogmed" i said

"k" harry said

2 b contined (tell me wat u think! unles ur rud(


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry it has been awhile since my last update. Something came up with a friend and she doesn't have internet so I had to live without fanfiction for a bit. But anyway, this is a really short chapter but if I have enough time, I will post another one in a few hours.**

AN: ok so u pplz suld PLZ stop calling me a trol. im not stupid. ur the stipid 1 becuz ur the pplz reding a story u dnt even like. uif u dnt liek it dnt read it ok. its not that hard retards.

here is the rest of my stroy:

oh an sum of my buton things r werd so thins may b diferent. sry!

**AN: Ok so, people should please stop calling me a troll. I'm not stupid. (Please someone put her out of her misery and explain to her what a troll actually is.) You are the stupid one because you are the one reading a story you don't even like. (It is one thing if the story has proper grammar and at least makes a bit of sense, but this is in a different category of it's own.) If you don't like it, don't read it ok. It's not that hard retards.**

**Here is the rest of my story, **

**Oh and some of my button things are weird so this may be different. Sorry! (What the hell is that supposed to mean?)**

me and harry walked out the great hall door otu 2 the otusife and when we where therewb e waked dwn 2 the tre where me and eron had our efirst date **(Do you know how many times I had to read that sentence so I could finally understand it?)**. well i gues it wasnts a darte exactly buty it was kind of sa date igyues** (What?)**. so we wet terhe it was realty wed becuz thts where mer an ron had our firsdt daet thing** (I'm still confused why you would take your current boyfriend to a place where your late boyfriend, who also happens to have had a fling with your current boyfriend, and you used to hang out as well.)**. hen web finaly started 2 get there harry said:

`we shuld mkae out!` harry said 2 me

`k i sad bac 2 harry** (That was way too casual.)**

àns so harry lened in 2 kiss me and i kiss him bac and we kissed under the tre. jusrt then

BAM!

OMG WAT HAPEDNÉ i scarmed** (I have no fucking clue since you didn't tell us what went "BAM"**

i dnt no wat happen!

i loked up and then i saw ron** (Wait, I thought he was dead? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!"**

`hary u bastard!`he scared 2 harry

`tay is my gf reastard`

`OMG RON u came bac 4 me` i said 2 ron **(I thought you were going to make out with Harry?)**

`yes` ron said bac 2 me

`snapes kiling spel wasnt as god as he thot it was. the rretarted idiot** ( What do you mean the spell wasn't good enough. You fucking died. Dead is dead, you can't just come back whenever you want to like Dustfinger.)**` ron said bac 3 me

`lol he is a idiot` i said bac 2 ron** (Why is it after you make out with someone, you can just dismiss them and call them names afterwards? Can't you show a little affection. What happened to Harry? And where are all the other cannon characters?)**

`why r u with harry` ron said bac 2 me and a singl tear ruan dwn his facae as heabv said it

`becuz i thout u where DEAD!` i scarmed at ron **(Yes, but you also got together with him about an hour after he died.)**

`but i wsbnt` ron scarmed 2 me **(They sure like to scarm)**

`but i thout u where` i scarmed geting agnry. **(Well I usually scream only when I'm angry. Or when I am having an orgasm, but no one wanted to know that. Either way, that sentence didn't make much sense.)**

`but nown tht u no i wanot` ron said bac 2 me

`I WANT 2 GET BAC WITH U DUH!` i sacmnred at ron,.

`I LUV U` i sacredm wo thnking.

`omg did i jst say thtÉ` i said 2 myself

`yes` rib said bac 2 me, whe was smiling

i blushed.

`i luv u 2` he sad 2 me.

then me and ron walk 2gether bac up 2 the casle.

2 b continuyed (srry it was short but i hav a good idea 4 the nedt chapter!)** (Are you sure it is a good idea? I mean you thought this story was a good idea too.)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Yay! Another update. So first things first, thank you for all the reviews I haven't previously thanked for. And a special thanks to Sev'slittlesecret for pointing out the mistake in the title. I must have been high when I wrote it. High on life mind you. So I am pretty much always high. Except when I read this story; I lost my buzz and wanted to kill something. But back to the point, thank you for pointing that out. And everyone, don't hesitate to point a mistake out to me that I have made. It will in the long run make me a better writer.**

**So on with the monstrosity! **

AN: haers fck of k. ther where sum of u who where nice tho so i gues thts ok. also stop threting me plz. ts very rud u no. so stfu and get a life idiots and tarerd. if u sad nice things 2 me thn u can stay! :)

also th9is idot has been steling my storys and making fun of them. STOP IT SLT. ur pathetic u no tht? becuz u r? i red the reviews 4 her stry and every1 was so pateic making fun of my dtory. u pplz r fcking rud. just 4 ur fyi the man caracter is fcking 18 retartds, not 12. pplz kep sayingit was grosse 4 a 12 yar old 2 kis a old person but the man charcter ISNT 12, way 12 year old is in luv ertards. 4 pplz who think there smrt u pplz r realy stipid.

**AN: Haters fuck off ok. There were some of you who were nice though (Who?) so I guess that's ok. Also stop threatening me people (Who did that?) It's very rude you know. So STFU and get a life idiots and retards (Someone give me a medal for finding out what the hell tarred was.) If you said nice things to me, then you can stay! :) **

**Also, this idiot has been stealing my stories and making fun of them. STOP IT SLUT. You are pathetic, you know that? Because you are. I read the reviews for her story and everyone was so pathetic, making fun of my story. You people are fucking rude. Just for your FYI, the main character is fucking 18 (Then how the fuck is she still at Hogwarts? I mean it is possible, but really bloody unlikely) retards, not 12. (She certainly acts like it. Well maybe not the whole almost having sex in a hallway.)**

me an ron where waking bac 2 the casle. it was geting dark out. it was stil sundy so we had scool tmrow.

"fck school" i yeled and ron laghed at me. **(He probably laughed because you were "yeleding", what ever the hell that is.)**

"lol" he siad.

"but i hat it" i said 2 ron hoping he wuld undersdtn.

"me 2" ron said bac 2 me

"its stopid" i said bac 2 ron

"i no wat u men" ron said bac 2 me

"do u no wat?" i said 2 ron

"wat" ron sad bac 2 me

"we sholdnt go 2 scool 2morow" i said bac2 ron

"wel get in truble" ron said bac 2 me

"oh ur suh a gody 2shos" i said bac2 ron

"no bu we hav 2 go to schol" ron said bac2 me

"we hav potons al moning 2morow with tht retardt snape an he tinks ur ded" i sadi bac 2 ron

"god pont!" ron said bac 2 me relizning my point

"i no" i said bac2 ron

"wat shuld me do?" ron said bac2 me** ("What should me do?" lol, for some reason I keep picturing Golem saying that.)**

"i dnt no" i said bac 2 ron

" mayb we shuld gide" ron said ba 2 me

"but where?" i sad bac 2 ron

"i dnt no" ron said bac 2 me

the 2 of us walsed in silnts **(What is a silnts?) **4 a wile until we cam 2 the great ghal. we loked up onthe bultin bord and thn we saw a avrtisement. it sad tht blink182 **(No offence to Blink182 fans, but I really fucking hate that band.) **wuld b in england tht monday (which was tmrw!)**(No shit. You said you had school tomorrow and a couple of chapters ago you said it was Sunday.)**

"omg!" i sacrmed

"i luv blik182" i sarcmed again

"me 2 " ron scared.

"lets go c thm tmrw" i said 2 ron

"omg yes!" ron said 2 me

"yess!" i sracemd again

"i luv u ron!" i topld him and then we waked awy 2 ur sparted huses!

i put on ym oijamas (ia blac shit tht had 2 harts on it one was re n the other was pink and ht 2 harts where belding and the shirt sad: my hart is borkem then i put on my piajama pnts thy where blac sweet pans. the other slithinr grls i sared a rom with where starting at me becuz i loked so hapy when usly i dint. **(You wake up and say what a beautiful morning it is. I think they were probably starring because they are trying to find out how someone could get away with never wearing the fucking school uniform.)**

"godnight sbitces" i scraedm 2 them and thn went 2 bed for the night.

i wok up erly the next m,orning becuz i was ecited 2 go c blink182. i suck dwn 2 the gret hal but insted of going in i went otside and wated 4 ron. it was rely werly so ther wast many pplz outside. i waited there 4 abut 20 mintes until ron came out 2 c me.

"omg!" i scarmed and ran 2 him and kissed him on the lps.

" how r u" i askled him.

"good" he said bac 2 m,e

"thts good" i said bac 2 him

"so r u excited" i said 2 him

"yes" he sid bac 2 me

"me 2" i said bac 2 him

"thts good" he sad bac 2 me **(Some day, I hope to write dialogue that deep and emotional.)**

"so r u redy 2 go?" i said bac2 him

"yea" he said bac 2 me

"ok so hopw r we going 2 get to engand?" i said 2 ron** (At least she know that Hogwarts is not actually located in England, but in Scottland.)**

"i hav an ida folow me" ron said bac 2 me

"ok" i said bac 2 rom.

so i folowed ron runing acros the schoolyard** (Hogwarts has a school yard?)**. he looked so sexii in his skiny jens and his tgop. it showd his muscles perfeclty.

"ur so hawt" i told him wen we rached whever we where ging.

"thnx u 2" he sdaid bac 2 ,e

"thx" i said bac 2 him

'so way r we doin" i asid 2 hm

"where takin broms from the shed and suing them 2 fly 2 englang" ron said bac 2 me

"omg! god plabn!" i shuted to ron** (GOD PLABN!)**

"thx" he said bac 2 me

the ron went and tok out 1 brome from the shed.

"wat abut me?" i said 2 ron

"ur rid behind me" he said with a sexi smil.

"omg1 thts realy coot" i said 2 ron

"i no" ron said bac 2 me

so then me and ron flow 2gether 2 england 2 c blink182. we got thr jst intime and so we went an sa the cocert. after the concrt we got out.

"tht was a goed concert" i said 2 ron

"i no" ron said bac 2 me

"now were do we go?" i said 2 ron

"i dnt want 2 go bac 2 scool" ron sad bac 12 me

"why snt we get a hotl" i aked ron

"good idea" ron said bac 2 me

so thn me and ron went 2 get a gotel rom. we got a realy nice 1 in a fany hotel and went up there.

"this is nice" i sai 2 ron

"yea" ron said bc 2 me

then he quikly cam over and kised me on the lips.

"ur lips tast good!" i said 2 ron

"so do urs' he said bac 2 me

then he kised me again nd thensd he kised my hole body untilf he tok of my shirt an then he tok of my pants. then he took f ho his pnts and then put his dickn in2 me. it feltso god. **(I love it when it feels God)**

"this fels so god" i said 2 ron

" is it ur frst tim" ron said bc 2 me

"yes" i said bac 2 ron** (Then you should be screaming out in pain. It fucking hurts the first time. Actually, it hurts the first FEW times.)**

"good i want it 2 b spcil" ron said bac 2 me

"its wih u so it wil b" i said 2 ron

"ok" ron said bac 2 me

so then ron kept fcking me ove and ovr agin until he finaly was finshed then he tok ot his dick frm me and thn we put ur clotes bac on.

"tht felt god" i said 2 ron

"i no" ton said bac 2 me

"well i think we shuld probly go bac 2 hogwarts" i said 2 ron** (Real special first time.)**

"yea" ron said bac 2 me

so the 2 ofaus wnt 2 the bromstik and flew bac 2 hogwrts and we said by and we left 4 our commum rooms. t was a day i wuldnt 4get in my entire klife.

2 b continued (told u it wuld ba good chapte! tay lost her virginty 2 ron, so coot! tell me way u thinkl! SO LONG AS UR NICE)** (This chapter wasn't as bad as your other ones but I wouldn't celebrate is as being good.)**


	9. Chapter 9

an: if u hav sumthing men 2 say DNT DAY IT RETARDS k. u pplz jus say the same thin over and ovder agin and its stipud so STOP okay.

now her is the rest of mty stoy!

**AN: If you have something mean to say DON'T SAY IT RETARDS ok. (I love how she says to not say anything mean and then she calls us retards.) You people say the same thing over and over again and it's stupid. So stop okay. (Maybe you should take a hint then.)**

**Now, here is the rest of my story!**

Xoxofx

i wok uyp the next day erly after the conert. it was a tueday and so i had potons forst. so went dwn 2 the dumons an tok a set in the bac of class with rose.

"hi wher where u yeterday" she said 2 bme

"il tel u abut it latr" i said bac2 her

"k" she sad bac 2 me** (don't you share a dorm room together? Couldn't you have told her last night?)**

then al of a sudon snape cam in and told us ll 2 stfu.

"stfu idiots** (I want this version of Snape to teach one of my classes.)**" he sdared to us. evry1 stf afte he sad tht. he loked very angery and mad. rose and i imedately stoed taking becuz we new wev b in big truble if we ddnt stop talking. the clas was silnt an d we al waited 4 snape 2 talk agin.

"so 2day i hav news" he said an he lokaed vry mad abut sumthing.

"we hav a new studnt tih us/" he said 2 us al and he loked evn masder.

"who"evry1 was sraying. snape gav us a lok tht told us top stfu or hed kil us.

"ron weaslrey" he said an them pertnded 2 thro up in2 the garbag can nct 2 him.** (Are you sure he was pretending?) **

"omg!" i scarmed jst as reon cam in2 thea calsrom.

"hi tya!" i yeled 2 me and rawn over 2 met me and st dwn next 2 me.

"wat r u doing her?" i aked ron.

"STUF RETAREDTS** (What stuff?)**!" snape scarmmed. "u pplz r fciung retaresded!" he scared again. evry1 shu up after tht and we went along with the erest of teh clas becuz we new wed b in truble if we taked 4 the rest of eteh clase so we didt tak until after the clsas. when the class was ovr we went ont in2 the halway and i kiswed ron.

"OMG WHY R U A SLSITHRIN NOW?" i sacrmed and kised him agin.** (Since when can people change houses?)**

"becuz i culdnt b awy frm u durng the nites and stuff **(of course he couldn't)**!" ron said 2 me nd hten HE kised ME!

"omg i am so excited!" i scaremd

"so way do we hav next?" ron said 2 me fater we finshed kissing in the hal

" we hav creturs next!'i saiads 2 ron so we ewnt 2gethr ad walked 2 hargids hut in the outide of the schol. hagrid was ther and e was wtih this hors with wins.

"hi haggrid!** (Why is it no one can spell Hagrid's name? He deserves a hug for having to be put through all of this crap.) **"i sad 2 him and he wavd bac 2 me

"hi tay an ron" he said 2 me and ron.

"wat do u hav her?" i said 2 haggrsid

"a hilopgrit" he sad ac 2 me adn ron

"cool' ron said 2 ahgrgid.

so thn 4 the nxt clas we did stuf with hagrid dn lerned how 2 proply care 4 the anmal and stuf lik eth. the clss ende in n hur.** (NO WAY! You learned how to care of an animal in Care Of Magical Creatures class!)**

"tht was a god clas" i said 2 ron

"yea" he said bac 2 me

so thn me and ron awked 2 the slitherin commum rom 2gthr.

"im so hapy ur a slitherin now" i said 2 ron

"me2" he asid bac 2 me

thne we kised 4 a while. plz stared at us agbut i dfint mina it was k with me. just whn me and on wher going 2 gos bnac 2 my bd rose ran in.

"OMG! RON ASDN TAY UB 2 HAV 2 COM HER!"

2 b contninued! )tell me wat u think)


	10. Chapter 10

AN: stfu u retarde idsiot k u pplz r stipid san i dnt car wat u think u dnt get me anyawy so stfy and die if u dnt liek my strry then DNT FCING RED IT U RETSARDS! omg u pplz who thuikur so smrt r realy just stopid idots wiht nohing beter 2 do then atack my stry veen tho u dnt dcking like it. wow thres a wrd 4 pplz like u an its RETARED.

**AN: STFU you retarded idiots ok. You people are stupid and I don't care what you think. You don't get me anyway so STFU (I do get that you are a dumbass.) and die if you don't like my story, then DON'T FUCKING READ IT YOU RETARDS! Omg, you people think you are so smart are really just stupid idiots with nothing better to do than attack my story, even though you don't fucking like it. Wow, there is a word for people like you and it is RETARDED. (We know. You only have been calling us retarded since chapter 2)**

xox

"om wat rose?" iscaremed she sunded socked

"snape comited sucid he is ut. he jmped frm hs fofice widow and laded in frnt of the scool. hes dead tay. omg wat r we gonna do?** (He's dead. What can you do?)**" rose said bac 2 me she was holing bac tears

"snape was a batrard anyways" said rpn 2 me. i was soched

"wtf ron?" i scaremd** (Didn't you call him a bastard as couple of chapters ago?)**

"snape was a god techer!" i said 2 ron agin. the fct tht he dint evn care tht snape die wa ghorible. i dint no if ic uld b with him after tht.

"he tryd 2 kil me ifts a god thing he fcking SUCS at th kiling corse or if b ded rite now!** (Yeah, I still don't understand how you are still alive.)**" ron said bac 2 me

"i dnt care he wa my favrite techer!" i sacremed bac 2 ron and thn i ran up 12 my rom. ron tryd 2 folow me but i slmed the dor in his face.

"go bac 2 grinfridor u fcking tratoe** (How did he manage to switch houses in the first place?)**" i scramed 2 him. i herd him cying outsid my dor but i culdnt bare 2 opn it 4 him. i ran 2 my bag wit al my rasor in it and puled ut one an then stated 2 cut myself. i cut mysef over and ovr aign until ther was blod all over my clohs nd my flor.

"RON IS A BATARD" i scarmed whil i cut deper and deaper. over and ovr i cut until my bed was covred in blod. then evrything wen fuzzy and i fanted. **(AGAIN! Get some help.)**

RONS POSV:::

omg i dnt no wat 2 do. tay if so mad at me but it wsnt my fault ecuz snape tryd 2 kil me an if sum1 who tryd 2 kil tay did hed be hapy 2. shes suh a slut anywy so god ridane 2 her. i derverse beter thn her becuz she dsn5 recpest me nd my opions so im going 2 get th fck out of her lief.

"go 2 fcking hel bith" i scarmed 2 tay at te top og my longs "i hop u dy of AIDS!" i scaremd luded.** (She probably will. That or herpes or syphilis or whatever else you can think of.)**

thn i stod up and walkd anyway out the commum rom door 2 the halway and upstars 2 the grinfodor tower. i went in.

"im bac!" i scarmed realy madly becuz i wa smad at tay. thn al a uden sum1 cam up 2 me and fcking pnched me the fac!

"wtf who do u thnk u ar bastrd!" i scfaremd.

"hary potter**(No shit.)**" hary scarmed bac 2 me** (Not a bad comeback though.)**

"fuc u hary u pnched me bastasrd" i said bac 2 harry

"u dwesvered it" harry said bac 2 m

"i no" i said bac 2 hary

"so did u dmp tht fgly bitc?** (Didn't you date her for a couple minutes even though Ron had literally died an hour previously?)**" harry said 2 me

"yes" i said 2 harry

"good" harry said 2 me. then the 2 of us ewnt dwn 2 the firplac and did homwork.

"do u stil luv me?" harry sudeny said 2 me** (Probably not. He dumped you like yesterdays garbage so he could sleep with Tay.)**

"i dnt no" i said bac 2 harry

"why?" harry said bac 2 me

"i knd of mis tay" i said bac 2 harry

"dnt say tht or il punch u agin!" harry siad bac 2 me

"fine" i sdaid bac 2 harry.

ROSES POV:::

"omg tay is so mad an she brok up wigh ron now at am i supose 2 do. i dnt no. thisb is hoible." i said 2 myself.** (How does her break up concern you at all?)**

then 2 tyri and fix the hole prolbem i decide 2 go up 2 tays rom and try 2 convine hwer 2 get bac with ron becuz thy belong 2gether. i was sjut abut at the her door wen i reliesed.

"OMG! i can go out withn ron now!** (Because that doesn't go against girl code at all.)**" i whipered 2 myself. her was so coot and now tht her brok up wtgh tay i culd finaly ask him out!

so ik left the commum romm and ran up 2 the grinifodr gcommum room **(How did you get into the common room? Did you con Neville into giving you the password? Seriously, where the hell are the rest of the cannon characters?)**and saw rn by the feir with hary. They where kising!

"omg hat!" i scarmed and thny stoped kising.

"wt ron u r fcking cheting on tay" i scarmed** (But you know that they are broken up? What the hell is going on?)**

"shne brok up withn me so fvk her!" ron scared bac 2 me.

"so ... ur ovre here?" i saked ron.

"yes, rck her fckikng ded" i scaremd

"thn...do u mind if i oin?** (Yes I do. Please stop the madness.) **"i sadi 2 rn and harry.

"sur" harry said 2me hne was smilig 2 me.

sol i tok iof my tolp; an bottom an thne harry and ron stated 2 kis me. thn ron wen and tok up my nts and nderwarl. **(Please stop.) **harry and ron tok tuns fcking me ovre and over agin **(…..O_o)**until thney where both done.

"tht was amzing"i said 2 tem

"thnks!" th4y both said ac 2 me

"no probkm!" i said bac 2 them

thnen the 3 of usb walkd 3gethrer to the great hall 2 eat super and themn hed of 2 bed fr te nite. we ate at thne ginfindor table. i loked 4 taty a litle bitm but i was busy lkoking at hary and ron 2 so i digured she was stil in her room crying. me ron ad hary ate unitl we wrnt hungry anymor abnd then went of 2 the grinfindor comun rom and went 2 bed. (i deced 2 sitch 2 grindor 4 the nite!** (WHAT!)**) lter tht nite we fcked agin. it waw even beter than the firt tim ecuz ahrry and ron did stuf 2gether 2 adn let me watch.** (WHY?)** it was soo coot 2 c them kis and fck. i luvedd it. but soo it was tim 4 bed so we went 2 bed 4 the nite. i 4got al about btay!

1 b conintued (say NICE THINSG dstop saying MEAN THINGS RETARTSD!)

**(*Goes off to cry in a corner*)**


	11. Chapter 11

AN: stfu k if udnt liek it dnt red it fuckers now go fk urslfs so tht u can leve me alon and i dnt hav 2 read ur shit ever agin ok. stfu and go bac 2 ur momys

**AN: STFU ok. If you don't like it, don't read it fuckers. Not go fuck yourselves so you can leave me alone and I don't have to read your shit ever again ok. STFU and go back to your mommies. **

XOX

::TAYS POVS:::

wtf wher was i was th first qwuerstionv tht acvm 2 my mind when it wok up.

"watr hapened 2 me?" i sakded

"ui cut ursel 2 much thn at hapen tay.** (For the second time. You really should go see a therapist. Your life with A Therapist, I can picture the story now.)**" sum1 xad bac 2 me

"who tht fck r u?" io saked

"its me snape" snaep said b ac 2 me** (Snape, when you die during a Mary-Sue story, stay dead. You can save yourself a lot of grief that way.)**

"omg wtf u agni!" isacred

"u brok me nad ron up!" isacredm agin geting mader and mader.

"fck u idot and gtf out og my lif" i sacremd bac 2 saape** (Are you not worried that he randomly came back to life?)**

"i jujst asaved ur oife 4 a second time and thniks is how u tasy thank uy?" i said 2 em** (Wait, when did you save Snape the first time? The second time for that matter as well?)**

"ui dnt car if u save my lief u brok ron and me up" i sacremd agin.

"good" snaoe said bac

"stfu bastrard!" i shutd and rn out of the rom b ujt b5 i culd ge out the dor closed in frnt of me

"omg wtf losr!" i scaredm 2 snape

"say thnk u" he asid bac 2 me

"no" i said bac 2 him

"say it" he said bac 2 me

"no" i sadi bnac 2 him agiain.

"thn u arnt geting out." snape said bac 2 me\

"wtf" i said abc 2 sanep

"u herd me" snaep bac 2 me

"fin thnnk u" i said bac 2 snape

"now let me out" i said 2 snape

"maybe" nsape said bac 2 me, he loked EVIL.

"omg LET ME OUT!" i scaredm and baned the door realy hard. snape just laughed

"hahahahahahahahahhhahaahahaa" snape sai 2 me

"omg wat do uy waent frm me?' i scarmed geting nruvous

"i dnt want anything frm u I JUST WNT U!" snaope said 2 me

"omg u sic bastart!** (You didn't mind making out with him a couple chapters ago.)**" i sacred 2 me na banged the dor louded.

"silencendo!" snaope scremad and i culdnt talk anymore.** (No shit.)**

"thner tht wil shut u up!" snape said nad then b4 i new it snape had trasnsfrmed into DUMBLEFOR!

"OMG WTF?" i scarmed 2 snpae who was now dumbldor** (What the fuck)**

"u thot i was god** (You aren't God! NOOOO!)**, but realy I WAS WRKING 4 VOLEMOT" dulbmordore sacredm bac 2 me** (?)**

"OMG! HOW CN I B SO STIPID! SNAP IS DED!** (So he didn't randomly come back to life? Well at least he was put out of his misery.)**" i scarfemd

"yes u idoit tht was mny plan al along, SNAP NEVR COMITD SUIDIDE I KILED HIM" dumbldor screamed bac 2 me

"omg u BASTARD!" i sarem bac 2 dumblodor

"hahahahah u idoti u fel rite in2 my trp!" dumblefor scremed 2 bac2 me. then he wealked 4ward 2wards me.

"omg wtf r u doni" i scarmed geting scared

"im gong 2 rap u!" he asid laghing** (You are going to rap? About what? Who is your influence? 50 Cent, Kanye, B.O.B., Eminem, Biggy Smalls?)**

"omg u sic bastrard!" i saremd** (He can't be that bad at it.)**

"hahahahah" he scramed evilyiy. then, rite wen he was about 2 rape me

"gtfo ur hands of my grlfrend!** (But you aren't dating. Remember, you are screwing her friend with Harry.)**" ron screamed carging tru the door.

"omg wtf!" dumbldor sreamed wen ron kikc him in his bals.

"omg ron u saved me!" i scare3d

"im srry 4 beig a idot" i said 2 me

"i 3give u!" i said bac 2 him

"now lts get ut of her b4 he can trp us!" ron said and the 2 of us ran ut of the rom. We ran up 2 the grinfdor commum room.

"omg rose awt r u donig here?" i said wen i asws rose and harry siting 2gether.

"nohtng" rose said guitily

"omfg u where fcking harr!" i saredm

"u slut! **(Aren't you one though?)**" i scaredm agin.

"i nver fcked harry!" rose scramed ay me

"stop ur fcking lis i hate cheters tht betry slitheruin!** (But you had sex with Ron. And that was before he randomly switched houses.)**" i scaremd bac 2he

"wtf u dated ron!" he scaredm bac 2 me

"bt we r sole mtes **(So that makes it ok?) **an he siwthced 2 slithering 4 me btich" i scaredm agin.

"fck u" she scaredm at me

"fck U' i scarmed bac at her luded atan she scaremd at me.

"bitch' she scredmed

"no ur the bitch!" i scaredm

"come on ron lets GO" i scaredm 2 ron and tok him by theb hands and drtaged him out ofg theb grifnfor commum room.

"fck tht bitch" i scarmed nd me asnd on went outsid 4 a walk

2 b ocntined (tell me wat u think i ur nice)


	12. Chapter 12

an: omg sryr i nevr upated in ad whil i wasd awy with my fmaikyl onn avction but ikm bac now so i casn ipdatye!

JHAPPY HALOLWEEN! omg r u eited! im going tircvk or tresting tonignt 4 sure ! watbut u?

so hates if u hav sujmthing men 2 say DNT SAY ITS TERATRD! Ok u pplz r stupi and i dnt want 2 her frm u gin?** (What part of that sentence do you think requires a question mark?)** got it? GOODE! STFU AND LEV ME ALON! i dnt even red most of ur reviwes vecuz they r 2 lon anyewy so u r weastibng ur tim. just say 'i liek it' if u like it. if u dnt like it then STUF.

**AN: Omg, sorry I haven't updated in awhile. I was away with my family on vacation (Why did you come back?) but I'm back now so I can update! (No one wanted you to.)**

**Happy Halloween! Omg are you excited! I'm going trick or treating tonight for sure. What about you?**

**So haters, if you have something mean to say, Don't say it retards! You people are stupid and I don't want to hear from you again. Got it? Good. STFU and leave me alone. I don't even read most of the reviews because they are too long anyway, (That doesn't make you seem like a dumbass at all) so you are wasting your time. Just say "I Like It" if you like it. If you don't like it, then STFU. (You must be a baby if you can't take a little constructive criticism.)**

XOX

em and ron strormed ut of the agreat hal adn outjidde. then we walekd over 2 a tre. then we fund the secrt pat uner the tre and wenrt undfer it. then we wher einv a buldig of sum tipe.

"where the bfck r we?" ron sai 2 me

"stuf" i said bac 2 ron

"tel me where whee at!" ron scaremed bc2 me

"in hogmed" i sad bac 2 ron

"o" ron said bac 2me

"yes so stuf now" i scarmed bac 2 ron

"k" he asud bac 2 me** (This is probably the best dialogue she has ever written)**

me and ron sdat therb 4 a whil becuz we hasd nothibng beter 2 do tbut then finaly we got baord. it was as long time under fiomnaly ron said sumthing

"aty i hav 2 tel u sumthing" ron siad 2 me

"wat" i sadi bac 2 ron

'i aslo fcked rose" eron said bac 2 me

"OMG U FCKING BASTWER REBERTAYER OMG GO JKIL URSELF!** (…You guys were broken up at the time though)**" i scaredm. th ni ran iout of the builing we where ikn na outhb 2 hogmds nd 2 the candy shot. tjhen i tok a opil of candy and te it al. then i rembered!

"OMFG ITS HALOWEN!" i scaredm thn the perosn eho owned the candy shotp cam out. sh toikld me becu it was ghaloween i culd take as much cnandy as i wanted!** (Because that won't get him fired)**

"omg tak this u fckin bastrd rion and u slut rose!"** (What does candy have to do with this? Didn't you just run away from Ron?)** i scaredm. the candh owner tol me 2 tfu tho so i had to stop srambed. i rhen tok a hole vbunh of andy and aais thnk u andthen wallk bac 2 hogwrts eith my candty. hen i got 2 hogwast i remberde thre was a fest so i nwet 2 the great hal and saw the rfeat. thta dslut rose, tht bastrad hary adn tht toerh basdtsrd ron. i sat by mself andb uesd a poket nife 2 cut muyself uner the table.** (And no one noticed?)** thnh i loked up. SDUIBMKLDEDOR WA SUITING AT H EFRONT OF THE ROOM.** (Well that's where is seat is. Where else would he be?)**

"OMG DUBMDOR IS VIL!" I SCRAEDM

"wtf" evry1 els trned 2 loked at me

"stfu he stried 2 kil me 2day!**(Yea but you went off somewhere else so it must not have been all that important.)**" i saremed

"lire!" thy al shuyted at me

"ron tel mtem!" i scaredm

"i dnt no wat u r taing abut" ron sacred bac 2 me

"tay tht was a haloween prnk!" dubmlefore said bac 2 me

'o" i said bac. i tue tht maks sense. **(WHAT?)**then i saw snae

"OMG WT FSNAPE IS THER 2?" i scare

"snapoe inly petrended 2 die 4 a haloween prnk 2" dumblddor said agn 2 me.** (Again, WHAT?)**

"o!" i said thn i at um of the fest. evry1 else atet 2 the frst of the fest then we ad 2 go to b ed. i loked over 2 rose nd noiced tht wshe was goingn 2 up2 the grindfior commum room wutb ron and hrry.

"slutr!" i sacremebd andb ran don 2 the slitherin commum room by myself. hen i got teer i used my rasor blide 2 cut myseklf. i was so amd at evry1. no1 liekd me anymreo. i kep cuing and cuting. itb hrt mor an mor but ui nevrf noticed.

"I HTE MY LIEF" i sacrembed cuting agin and agin

"NO1 LIKES ME!" i scaremd agin and cuter deper into me.

"I WANT 2 DI!" i scarmed agin cuting ever deping htis time. then eerything wetn fuzzy.

"OMG NOT AGIN!" **(Not shit) **i shted b4 fanting. **(This is the third time right? Maybe you should get the hint that cutting yourself is bad.)**

:RONS PIV:

omg i fel so bad now becuz i jsut had sexc withb ros eaign evn thoi love tay. this is so stupid. sehb enve4r even lsiten 2 me. but i no i stl love her! i just no it! and she luvs me 2! i siad

"FUC U ROS" and then ran down 2 tbe slithering commum rom.

"TAY TAY I AM HER!" i shotued but no1 answered.** (Didn't she break up with you? And you turned into a girl?)**

"TAY!" i shted agin. i ran in2 her room.

"OMFG!" i scaremd. tay wea s laying on the flor with in a pil of blood. i pikced her up adnd took here 2 the hosptial rom wher the nruse gav her a ptoion

"shel b ok" thje norse said 2 me.** (She has passed out three times. That is NOT ok!)**

'good" i said bac 2 the nourse.

"she jut neds a bit of res" the nurse adi bac 2 me

"il stay witg her" i sdid bac 2 the nurse.

"gret" the nurse saud vbc 2 me.

so i stod ther and w3atch tay sleep. this was al my fault. if i nevr slept witbh rose thenb tay wuldh av evrn cut herslf and evrything wuld be okay aign. i wated wth tay for a cuple hors. then, i loked outside hte widow. thts when i saw dubmelfort and sape entering harigds hut.

"wtf r thy doing?** (Visiting Hagrid? Is that a crime?)**" i saidb it was like 4 in the norning.

they wher trying 2 opn up the door 2 hagrids hut. then i ntoiced harids sleiping otu the bac of his hut into hte forbidn foret. jus wen he was out of the site dubmdlefor and snape finaly got theb dor open. the scarembed wen they saw hagrids was gone.

"OMFG SNAP AND DUMBDLEOFR R EVIL!" i sared. it wasnt a haloween prnk after all.

"wqat am i going 2 do?" i sacmrbed agin. just then tay wok up.

"OMG TAY WE HAV 2 SAV HAGRISD!" i scaredmed.

"why?" tay scared

"beczu snap and dumbldoefor and trying 2 kill him!" i sacermed agin.

"OMG LETS SO!" tay sscarmewd and 2gethre we ran 2 hagids hut!** (None of that made any sense. At all! Someone explain to me what the hell just happened.)**

2 b contienduy (lev NICE COMENTS!)

HAPPY HASLLOWEEN!


	13. Chapter 13

**It had been awhile hasn't it? I've been busy with school. College is a bitch, I'll tell you that. But I decided to take a bit of a break and send this out. So, let us continue with the monstrosity.**

An: omg i m so sry i havnt wriet anything foer the las WEAK! i awes stating 2 get bord fo the dstry and i thout asbut ending it but id wecied nt 2 becuz i liek it and i have ides on ho 2b contine it!

**AN: Omg, I'm so sorry I haven't written anything in the last week. I was starting to get bored with the story and I thought about ending it but decided not to because I like it and I have ideas on how to continue.**

XOX

"hagrjd deds ot help!** (?)**" i scaremed 2 ron

"omwtf?" raon scrambed bac 2 me

"we hv 2 go save him!" i scaremed bac 2 ron.

soi then me nand ron ran ot 2 hawtgrids huase in teb outisde ofb thne castle we aw tht nape ansd dubmlrfor wer atcking hagrid

" IT U RETQS! **(Is it just me or has her spelling gotten worse?)**" I scaremd runing up to them.

"AVDRA KADSVA!" scanremdf 2 me but his soprl mised nme and hitb as tre behindbn mne instedf.

"lol ur naidot!" i scaremd 2 snaope who eran at me.

"no!" i scamrfed and dron pujnch snape inb the nuts **(Poor Snape. That has got to hurt.)**

"mmtherfucjker!" snaeo scaremd 2 ron

"retartd" ron scaremebd bac 2 snape

"shth UP!" dujbmledor said

"get the fuc aweyt frm her TYA!" hagirf yeld 2 me

"ok!" i sacmed and ran intol the forbind foest! i keptrunikgn and rinin becbz i was sdosv scare dthast dubmelfr and nsdape wher gogin 2 kol me. i ketol runikngb ujhtil u nkt realikzed tht ron was sdtil ther. **(OK, back up. What are you trying to say? I don't think my brain processed any of that. So, you screamed, then ran into the forest, and then after that it is all a blur.) **

"OMG!" i saremd and sturned around and rhan back

"avda kafvad** (Can't you try to at least stick with one spelling variation of Avada Kadavra? You have used so many, it is hard to keep track)**" i scamred adn ptined the my wnadb at snae and dumbleofr and it hit them int he ntus **(Don't hit someone with a killing curse in the nuts. That's just mean.)**and they did.** (What did they do?)**

"omg u savd mne ay!" rin said adn he aern over 2 kis me** (You know, for "emos", they say OMG a lot.)**

"no prbm!" i siad bac 2 ron

"we hvs 2 run" hgird said 2 theb both of me tbnad ron.

"swhy?" i said bac 2 hagerid

"becu volmdmart wil no u kied dumblkforna dna snaeop and jhel wnt 2 koll u 2!** (Wouldn't Voldemort be happy that you kill Dumbledore? You should seriously read they books because I don't think you understand what it going on.)**" hagird bac said 2 me

"OMG NO!" iscarmed adn rstarted 2 cry

"dbtn wrry il portct u tayr" ron said vb2 me

"thnx!" i saidb sotping to cry and ghugin ron.

"mno problem" ron adi bac 2 me bklushing.

"do u hav any friends u want 2 vav 2?" hagrd said 2 us

"yes!" I scaremd

"rose!"** (Were you not just talking about how much you hated Rose a few chapters ago? Isn't Rose also the name of Ron's future daughter? I wonder how Hermione would feel about naming their daughter after a sex partner from the past. Where is she anyways? Well, at least she and the others are smart enough to stay away from all of this crazyness) **

"and hry' hary siad!**(?...Harry said he wanted to save Harry? You sure you don't mean Ron?)**

"oky u bhav 2 go nad get rhtem!" hagri sadi 2 us

"ok we wil!" i scarmed abd me and ron weran ba c23 up 2 ht ecastkle 2 find eorse nad hary. theyb wher in the grindor comun rom pyng cheker.** (Checkers? I think you mean Wizard's Chess.)**

"we hav 23 ron awy vodemot is comign!" i samred

"omg " rorse said bac 2 me** (I thought Rose hated you? You guys screamed at each other last time.)**

"lts so!" hary scared

theb ther of us rabn dwn 2 hagrid agan.

"o k we ary reding bargid " i sadi 2 arg id

"god" he hnsaid bac 2 e

"whr r we gonig?" said rose 2 ahrigd

"te forbidebn forts!** (But you just came from there? What is going on?)**" harigd said 2 rose

"omg no!" i sacrmed

"tht plce is dngerous! **(No shit)**" ron scrmed

"its the olnlyn p;alceb we r safe!" hafrirdsadi.

"k lets go!" hatyh said.

2 b comntieued! (LEV NICE COMENTERS THIS TIE RETARSD AND MNAKE THME SHRT!)** (You want those who leave you flames to put on a shirt and tie?)**


	14. Chapter 14

Alina's Note:

Hey, guys. So, as you all may, or may not know today (Nov. 9th) is my sister (Tamara)'s birthday! She is turning 13. For a birthday present I decided to write a chapter for her :) Now, all I did (well am going to do :P) is type exactly was she says. No changes. It'll be her words, but I'll just type them out for her, to make it a bit easier! Hope you all appreciate it, and Happy Birthday Tamara! You're officially a teenager now :)** (I think this may be used as evidence of Tamara really being a troll. On the bright side, I don't have to try to figure out what the hell her author notes say.)**

Author's Note:

Happy Birthday to me! It's my birthday, SO DON'T SAY ANY MEAN THINGS. Thank you, Alina, for writing the story out for me, I really appreciate it. Now all you retards can STFU about my bad spelling okay. I don't want any bad comments about this chapter. **(I wonder how "Alina" feels about her sister using nasty language.)**

XOX

Me, Hagrid, Ron, Harry, and Rose all ran into the forbidden forest. It was dark and I was scared. I grabbed onto Ron for comfort and he put his arm around me. It was really coot.** (Did you just use "coot"? Dear God this whole family is stupid.)**

"I'll protect you Tay." He said to me.

"Thanks." I said back.

"No problem" Ron said back to me.

"Shut up!" Hagrid said to us. **(Why is Hagrid so angry? What did you do to piss him off?)**

Me, Hagrid, Rose, Harry, and Ron all kept walking. The forest was getting darker.

"Hagrid where the hell are we going?" Screamed Rose.

"Be quiet!" Screamed Hagird

"Make me!" Rose screamed back. Harry kicked her.

"Oww WTF Harry?" Rose screamed to Harry.

"Shut up!" Harry screamed back.

"Make me!" Rose screamed back to Harry.

"Will you just shut up?" I screamed to Rose.

"Fine." He screamed. **(Wow…..What the hell is wrong with you people?)**

We kept walking through the forest. Hagrid lead us to a cave.

"We will have to hide in here." Hagrid said to us.

"Why?" I said to Hagrid.

"Because Voldemort will be looking for us now that you killed Snape and Dumbledore." Hagrid said back to me.

"Oh!" I said back to Hagrid.

"But why can't we just kill Voldemort too?" Rose said.

"WTF are you retarded Rose?" **(Aren't you?) **I screamed.

"What?" Rose screamed back.

"Voldemort is evil, we can't just kill him!" I screamed back to Rose.

"Well why not?" Rose screamed back to me.

"Because he'll kill you before you kill him." **(Not necessarily true…. Harry killed Voldemort. Professor Quill was evil and Harry killed him.) **Harry screamed to Rose.

"Oh." Rose said and she shut up.

"You all have to keep quiet." Hagrid said to us.

"Why?" Rose said to Hagrid. **(Christ you guys ask a lot of questions.)**

"Because someone will head us idiot." Ron screamed to Rose. **(Someone will "head" you? Do you guys only ever yell at Rose.)**

"Who is out here to hear us?" Rose screamed back to Ron.

"I don't know!" Ron screamed back to Rose.

"Shut up!" Screamed Hagrid. Ron and Rose shut up.

Me, Ron, Harry, Rose, and Hagrid all spent the night in the cave. It was really cold because we didn't have a fire. Hagrid tried to make one but he was too stupid to figure out how** (! You are such an asshole!)**, so we sat without a fire for the whole night.

"OMG it was cold last night!" I said.

"I know!" Rose said back to me.

"I was cold too." Harry said.

"Me too!" Ron said to Harry.

"I wasn't!" Hagrid said to us. We all laughed, but then I got depressed.

"I miss Hogwarts." I said.

"Me too." Rose said back to me.

"Me three." Ron said.

"Me four." Harry said.

Me, Harry, Ron, and Rose began to cry in the cave. Hagrid left because we were annoying him. **(How was he not annoyed earlier? All you guys ever do is yell at each other)**

"Where did Hagrid go?" I said.

"He left." Harry said.

"Oh!" I said back to Harry.

"Where did he go?" Rose said.

"I don't know." Ron said back to Rose.

Hagrid came back later that day with good news.

"OMG! Guys, we can go back to Hogwarts now! It's safe." **(It's safe? Just like that? After all the hubbub you made about having to hide out?) **Hagrid said to us.

"OMG! Yes!" I screamed. **(Surprise, surprise. You screamed.)**

"YES!" Rose Scream.

Harry and Ron screamed 'YES!" too.

Me, Hagrid, Ron, Harry, and Rose all walked back to Hogwarts together.

"I want to go to bed, in a proper bed." I said.

"Me too." Rose said.

"Same." Harry said.

"Me too." Ron said.

Me, Harry, Ron, and Rose all walked down to the Slytherin common room and went to sleep on the beds in there. We were very tired. But, the next day we knew we had school so we had to go to bed because if you go to bed later before a school day than you will be tired during school. **(Are you just rambling?) **

"Goodnight!" I said to Harry, Ron, and Rose. **(You sure you didn't scream it?)**

Everyone else said goodnight too and we all went to bed.

Tamara: To be continued! (Only nice comments because it`s my birthday. I DON`T WANT ANY MEAN COMMENTS!)

Alina **(a.k.a. Tamara/Tariaha/Ebony Jr.)**: Happy Birthday again Tamara!


	15. Chapter 15

**Alright this is the last chapter. I don't believe she made anymore chapters. I think she started another story. "Unfortunately", all of her stories have been removed from her profile. If any of you know where I could get it, I would be willing to do it. But I'm not suicidal enough to really go search for it.**

ab: ok so u pplz whre stil 2 rtasded last pat VEN THO MY SITER ALIKNA WOTE IT SO ITS WUDL BE SPET RITE RETATS.

u plz r clry jelus of my stioer or sumthn becuz ur acintng RETARED and stopid and idotic. oky so stfu ifu dnt liek my stry becuz ITS MYN STOY and ITS MYEN. ok. get tHT THRU UR RETARTED HEDS!

si UF Y DNT WANT REED MY STRY GTFO AND LEV BECUAZ U DNT HAV 2 RED IT AT ALL ADBN UR WATING UR TIME WITHN REDANIG IF IF U DNT LEIK IT. NOOT MIEN!

**AN: Ok. So you people were still (I have no idea what she tried to say here. Retarded?) last part even though my sister Alikna wrote it so it would be spelt right. (She still spelt cute "coot". Her spelling isn't all that great. If she really exists at all.)**

**You people are really jealous of my sister or something because you're acting retarded and stupid and idiotic. (Well I thing you are being repetitive and repetitious and repetitious.) So STFU if you don't like my story because it's my story and it's mine. (Because I think you are annoying and irritating.) Ok? Get it though your retarded heads! (I really thing you need to see a therapist or something.)**

**So if you don't want to read my story then get the fuck out and leave (Are you trying to be repetitive? You have been doing it a lot this chapter.) because you don't have to read it at all and you are wasting your time reading this if you don't like it. Not mine.**

XOX

whne i wok upo the next moning i said

"FUCB I HAVE FUCING CLASS TODY!" i scarmed it weok ron up and hne then he yelked at me for beng 2 luod.

"sry." i siad bac 2 ron

"its ok" he said bac 2 me

theb 2 of us gort redy and then toke a showder 2gether. (WE ALRDY SAW ECH OTHER NAEKD SO IT IS OK THT WE R DOIGN THIS. WE DINT HAV SEX IN THE SHOWR BNECUZ THT IS GROSE!) **(….You have put so much random disturbing shit in this story but you are grossed out by shower sex?)** os then fter the ashower me andb ron wetn donstares of the slithern commum room. pplz stred at ron menly becuz he was a grifbndor.

"STPO STARING" i scredmed 2 these pplz so then thney stopedf staring at us and ron becuz they wer retarted **(Get a different adjective)**(KINFG OF LIKE THEB PPLZ WHO COMENT ON M STRY VERVY SDINGLE FUCING TIME LIEKM IDOTS THT THEY R. COFH COFH) **(You had to have a random insult thrown in didn't you?)**

"these pplz r stopid lets go 2 the gret hall." i scai 2 ron

"k" he sadi bac 2 me

so hten me and ron wealked don 2 the gret hall and we havd breckfast. i had tost withb buter and lucy scharms cerial. then i had a glase of mlik to drik with itadn then i had a poptert adn then i had a fglase of ornge juce afte rtht. it was realy god becuz gbreckgast is my favurt meel of the day. **(At least she didn't put blood in her cereal. Nice to know she is not that insane.) **(AND ITS THE MOST IMNPROTNANT SO MAK SUR U ET IT!) **(This should be a breakfast commercial. Can you picture it? **

**Setting: A breakfast table. A girl eating toast, lucky charms, glass of milk, poptart, and a glass of orange juice.**

**Random girl: "Hi there! You should eat breakfast. It's the most important meal of the day! AND IF YOU DON'T, I'LL THROW TOAST AT YOU CAUSE THAT'S WHAT I DO WHEN I'M MAD!)**

after i wated 4 ron 2 finshed (becuz he is a vry slow eter!) **(I don't think it was mentioned that he was a slow eater if the books. A messy one who never stops eating maybe.) **the 2 of us wealked oujtside and went to sit by the kicy tree tht hurts pplz. **(You mean the Whomping Willow?)**

"i bet u r 2 scared 2 go in hte secert pasageway under the men tre." ron said 2 me

"wtf no" i srceamed bac 2 ron

"thebn GO" ron scramed bac 2 me

"I WIL!" i scarmed bac 2 ron **(I'm sure that constantly yelling at each other is a perfect symptom of a loving relationship.)**

"GOOD" ron scaredme bac 2 me and thn i went ujop 2 teb tree adn went in2 the secert pasage way liek in the movie **(Little tip. When you are writing fanfiction, don't mention the movie so blatantly.) **whebn harry and herminoe jump ovre the tre and stuf but mr and ron sditn have 2 do tht becuz we wher smart enugh 2 do it smartly ybliek hermoine and hary becuz hermoine is a retart and hary is stopi.)

so wen me and ron whre i the pasage we walkde thru it al the way untli the old house tht hary ron hermoie sirus and lopin and the rat tht turned into a perosn wher **(That rat is named Scabbers. And that person is named Wormtail.) **in and then ron said

'i want 2 hav sex wiht u" ron said 2 me

"i want 2 hav sex with y!" I SCARMED BAC 2 RON **(Oh Jeez)**

sothen me an dron and sex on thre flore od tje old house plac adn we kisde and it was vry vry hot and ron was reely hot becuz he had abs and stuf and ther hot!

so aftre we finshed havng sex sum1 popd out of the cutin.

"i am rperting u 2 dumblfor!" the boiec caled

"omg wtf snaep!" i scraedm

"stfu tau" he scarmed bac

and tbe snaep ran ut of the hose plca and me and ron whe letf alon. i stated 2 cru becuz i was nervus tht em and and orn wuld b gong 2 get in truble. **(Never seemed to worry you before)**

"dnt cry tay" ron said 2 me adn hs voice made me sntop crying.

"but wher going 2 b in truble" i scarmed 2 ron

"not if we cathc csnape!" ron scarmed

so then me adnb ron ran thru the secert pasage and ran aftre snap. we cought up 2 him becuz heb was vry slow and ron used tht spel tht shots the persons wadn out of ther hands. so snaeps wadn was shot otu of his bhadns.

"omg" he scamred

"thts rite snaep!" ron scaremed

"BNASTARD!" he scaredm

me adn ron thn teyhed snape up 2 a pol in the wal of the scert pasage. and ron siad he wuldnt b abel 2 get out and snape sa scarmeding and i was lahging becuz snape was and idot and stuf. so then me and ron wakled bac up 2 the pasage btu sdubmledor was blocing up 2 oru way. **(Wait, what's going on?)**

"brgin me 2 sanep" he scarmed 2 us and we got rely scaered so ron led dumbdledor 2 snaep wh owas stiled tid up to the pole.

"OMFG WTF HAV U DNOE HIM!" scaremed dubmdlrodor

"they whre having sex!" scaredm snape

"STFU SNAEP!" i scarmed.

"SEX IS AGINST THE RUELS!" dumbldoefr scarmed 2 me and ron.

"srry!" ron scarmed and i scaremed it 2 by dubmdlordor loked rely mad and told ron ad i 2 go bac ujp 2 the casle wile he thught up a good pnishment 4 us becuz of wat we had don. so when we got up 2 the casle i began 2 cry becujz i was rely scared and mad and upest and ron wa s an idot 4 thrnking of tying up snaep.

"UR AN IDIOOT!" i scared me rln and eran up 2 my bed and loked the door and then stared 2 cut my rist. but thn i remberd wht hapened last tiem and i stopd but it was rely hadr 2 becuz i was realy mad. so insted i took a picutre of ron and usd my raosr to stratch it alot until he loked stopid amd uglty.

2 b continuend! 9stfu if u dnt liek it reastrds!) **(It would not be continued.)**


End file.
